Damn. That makes sense
I know im like the sherlok holmes of sexual problems
everyone made a circle around them and startd chanting fight fight. they wernt fighting, they were dry humping
whats the proper etiquette for returning a closet door to a random girl you met and do not know her name?
THEY ARE MY AGE. THEY ARE YOUR LITTLE SISTER'S AGE THIS IS A DELICATE MATTER. CAPS LOCK
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
dude, you cant keep using "she roofied me" as an excuse to bang all these fat chicks
He told me the escort brought him pizza. Can something be sad and awesome at the same time ?
I am convinced that after two dates and a few adult sleepovers that he still doesn't know my name.
I am "lost the control of my head" high right now.
So me and him are making out, and the other two are on the couch behind us. he randomly stops kissing me and goes "oh god I think she just took off her shirt" I look behind me and I see her tits flapping up and down. This man has amazing senses..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Just replaced the batteries in my vibrator without turning on the lights. I need to get laid.
I still think the kiddie pool full of jello option is worth exploring. Just sayin'.
Next Halloween, remind me to find a different wingman. Walking out in your pirate costume talking like Captain Ahab while i was banging her and telling me I had to harpoon the white whale really pissed her off.
You don't understand. There's baclava and there's post sex baclava. You can't compare the two.
If my plane goes down do me a favor. Break into my house and get the batman costume and swing out of my bedroom.
Dude, you screamed I AM THE WALRUS while giving a statue of Ronald McCdonald a lapdance. You were NOT sober.
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