ignore voicemail. the cock hath been unblocked.
you started puking right when a nickelback song came on..it was epic
Yeah. We was talkin. Its ok. My bed is too filled with pam for sex. Its like a slip and slide of butter product.
its no coincidence her full name and "cling" are the same in t9
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I want a picture of impoverished children wearing Oregon national champions shirts.
Yes, I feel sorry for the tribe that gets those. They won't be able to hide from the lions.
I hope the doctor doesnt lift up and my shirt and listen to my lungs. I dont want to explain why I have rug burns on my back.
Like fighting the continuous urge to sing Neil diamond "coming to America" kinda fucked up right now
he told me it was like eating gods vagina.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
i'm totally cool with all the dick sucking you're doing down there, but as your brother i think i'm supposed to warn you our parents will be home in 5
I just want dates and sex but the option to have that with whoever whenever I want
Well. I went to a frat party where they mixed gin and Mountain Dew. My kingdom for some olives and vermouth.
I accidentally called my professor daddy...and I think he liked it. Help, I'm scared.
Hey Cat, it's Michael. You made out with me for a hot dog last night and I feel super used.
So learned a new trick last night.... Taking body shots from my own tits... Mom would be so proud
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