Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
Sometimes I find that I've been touching my boob(s) without even realizing it.
Guess what? I had way too much to drink today. I'm properly wasted. Doing chores and playing video games while drunk. It's the nexus of stupidity and responsibility.
Wow, t9 really hates the phrase "slap her in her sanctimonious pie-hole."
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I feel like people whose favorite movie is Donnie Darko should not be allowed to talk. Ever.
I'm thinking we should try to start remembering stuff we do. Althought I kinda like feeling like Nancy Drew the next morning.
More like the Hardy Boys cause its kinda like a team effort.
THE PICTURE OF PEPPERMINT MOCHA MADE ME WANT TO TOUCH MYSELF
I think im gonna bang this 35 year old at a kids birthday party in the bathroom at this house while the kids open the presents.
What's the politically correct way of saying you've made someone your bitch?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
it wasn't until he got that douchey haircut that i started regretting sleeping with him
It was big, black, and had a smiley face tattooed on it. It was the perfect penis.
She helped me out of the car and i face planted into the snow.....and just stayed there and took like a 30 min nap.
Successfully defrauded the county government. What have you done today?
You ran out of his house yelling "I got the goods!" Then you pulled toilet paper rolls out from under your shirt.
Why is the floor coated in a 2 inch blanket of popcorn??
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