Sometimes I wonder if my friend studies mystic Christian theology because he's afraid to come out of the closet. Evidently, it's okay to talk about God coming inside you, but not to say the same about dudes.
I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
Well the light went out so I was throwing up by candle light. Strange moment in my life.
i have only one word for you: 3somewithnorwegiangirls
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
There are bud lights poping out of the zipper of my overnight bag and my dildo almost fell out in the elevator. not professional
for future reference: playing drunken strip-twister is a euphemism for a threesome. just thought you should know.
I vaguely remember trying to exfoliate my face with your leg hair. Sorry about that.
Dude if it is ever said "everybody get inside the police helicopter just showed up.". That means it was a successful party.
the last thing I heard was you screaming as the rodeo team herded you to the next party
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
That is romantic
Well sometimes you just gotta put your dicks and pizzas together to show you care
All I'm sayin is that I don't want to raise anything. Or deal with anything. Or having anything come out of my vagina. I mean, I don't think that's asking too much.
We tried to do sophisticated last night, but our low class kept shining through.
Thanks for fingering me to orgasm during Wu-Tang Clan
I don't want a big night. But I am okay if we wake up in a penthouse at Crown Casino.
Yea.. And you'll love me a whole lot more when I start letting my vagina make all the decisions..
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